Things That Make My Anxiety Shoot Through the Roof
A Partial List (bc the list is endless)
- •Crowds 👫👬👭I remember the first anxiety attack I ever had. I didn't know what it was. I was at a free outdoor concert with a friend and her family. I was nauseous and sweaty and felt like my ribs and chest were so tight they were going to explode. Her mom walked me to the edge of the crowd to get me some air so I could calm down. I was trying not to cry and I didn't want to inconvenience anyone by asking to leave early. I was supposed to sleep over, but asked my dad to pick me up from their house instead.
- •Traffic 🚗🚙🚕Makes me feel similar to being stuck in a crowd. When I have no means of escape, no way to get free, I start to panic. If I'm in traffic I have to blast the AC on myself, even in winter. I immediately start to sweat. I have an hour commute to & from work, and I'll often call my Nanny on my way home so I don't focus on what's going on around me, and also bc she is amazing and hilarious and she keeps me updated on the family.
- •Having Someone Else Plan My Schedule 📅Do we see a pattern here?? I have a lot of control-driven anxiety. I like to be in control of what's happening to me and around me. Being rushed or planned for or told what to do or where to be by someone else is extremely stressful for me. It is easier for me if I am in control of my surroundings and my situation. Whether that be where I am, my transportation, or the plans that were made, I like to have the entrance and exit plan.
- •When I Have To Be Very Social 💃🍷🍽👯By that I mean when there are many social events (parties, weddings, dinners, get togethers, etc.) around the same time. When I need to be out of my home or my comfort zone for a long period of time, or for many weeks/weekends in a row, it throws me in a spiral of anxiety&stress that I then have to take time to "come down from." This happens even with people that I'm suuuper comfortable with&love to be around. Example: a recent wedding weekend for my husband's family friends out of state.
- •Family 👸🏼👯I stress out over my sister and my family nonstop. I won't get into it here without her permission bc it's her story to tell, but she went through some SHIT last year and I spent MONTHS not sleeping, worrying about her. Chest-splitting, anxiety-ridden nights where I was dying of exhaustion, but my anxiety addled mind kept me awake through every worst-case (and sometimes best-case) scenario. Thankfully she is better than ever now and I mostly sleep like a normal human.
- •Too Much Noise 🔊🔇When there is too much loud noise (I don't mean just normal music/sounds or anything) it makes me feel very on edge. Ex: My husband's family has been Disney World Vacation Club members his whole life, so he likes to play Disney Park music around the house (I never knew people did this til I met him) & some of the park music I don't mind, but some of it can change my mood in two seconds flat & make me feel so anxious. It's just noise! And it's ALWAYS TOO LOUD! He always has the TV too loud too 😕
- •Not Having A Book To Read Next 📚Books are how I escape what's happening around me, how I "come down" from my anxiety, and my fave pastime. (I realize that I was probably using this as a self-soothing method as a kid when I was anxious or stressed to chill out and go into another world). When I don't have a book on deck, I get very anxious! I read two books just this week. Mostly for fun though, not much anxiety to speak of thus far. 🎉