I firmly believe that most of the things that make me unhappy (loneliness and low self-esteem) would not be issues if I were a woman. This is not to erase the experiences of women, but most women I know have no idea how hard it is to date as a man, from Tinder to the fact that we're always expected to make the first move. Here's a recap of my night
  1. Get called to bar by female friend who is engaged
    This is a whole nother can of worms entailing the regular exploitation of men and general manipulation. A story for another list. Friend tells me that she has a friend who's visiting, so I figure there will probably be at least one single girl at the bar, which is not usually a guarantee.
  2. Take cab to bar because no subways go there.
    Said friend lives around the corner.
  3. Get told that there are too many men in the bar.
    Wait 5 minutes to be let in.
  4. Get in bar with large group of people
    Even the people she invited were mostly male. As a fellow male, I am greeted immediately with passive hostility that comes with being competition.
  5. Be entirely ignored by everyone
    Except the friend who ignored me (sometimes she's nice). One girl I've met before (surrounded by three guys) greets me cheerily before not glancing in my direction for the remainder of the night. Friend of friend does not make eye contact after initial greeting.
  6. Get regularly bumped into
    Guys are expected to be in the area that's least comfortable.
  7. Pretty quickly decide to go home.
    Ratio is stacked against me and I'm tired.
  8. Cabs ignore me.
  9. Uber ignores me.
  10. Find a cab after about 10 minutes of waiting
    Crowded NYC
  11. Write list.