@ALANIS'S HANDS RANKED

  1. 6.
    Giving a high five
    High fives are the worstttttttt. They slow traffic, they spread germs, they embarrass you if you miss (look at the elbow people). Just smile at me or text me good job or something.
  2. 5.
    Flicking a cigarette
    I know I know "THEY CAUSE CANCER" but a good cigarette flicker looks cool af (Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct amirite???)
  3. 4.
    In her pocket
    Kinda boring, but I'm a hands-in-pocketer so I'm biased
  4. 3.
    Playing the piano
    This probably should be higher because I'm sure Alanis can jammmmm, but I think I read somewhere that a bad pianist is as hazardous as secondhand smoke probably so I'm being cautious
  5. 2.
    Giving a peace sign
    Such a useful gesture!! It says "hi!" It says "two, please!" It says "deuces!" It says " WORLD PEACE!"!!!! Wow!!
  6. 1.
    Hailing a taxicab
    Such a fulfilling thing to do. I can stop a car with just my arm?????? Side note: I hailed my first cab in downtown St Louis in college and this girl said "well it doesn't count if you're not in NYC" and then I made my first college arch nemesis!