THINGS THAT WILL HAPPEN BEFORE, DURING AND AFTER MY PITCH MEETING

  1. Before: As I drive I will stretch my arms towards the air conditioning vents to enjoy the relaxing sensation of cold air traveling up my sleeves.
  2. Before: Despite having an appointment, I will be strangely nervous at the gate when I give my name, and then elated when the gate goes up.
  3. Before: I will wonder, as I park, why someone at my age and with my experience still feels this way.
  4. Before: I will decline the offer of water, even though I am thirsty, because I don't like to be beholden.
  5. During: I will make a series of funny jokes and then tell a short story about my life and then tell a story that sounds like a "pilot" and then make meaningful eye contact.
  6. During: They will laugh and ask pertinent questions and chime in with their own personal reflections and there will be a pause and they'll say, "This is really great. Let us just talk about it internally for a bit. But we really like it."
  7. After: I will find a spot outside in a discreet location to call my agent and return emails.
  8. After: My agent will ask, "How did it go?" And I will say, "No fucking idea. They laughed. Had good questions. No fucking idea."
  9. After: As I drive I will stretch my arms towards the air conditioning vents to enjoy the relaxing sensation of cold air traveling up my sleeves.