IN 2016 I RESOLVE TO

  1. Write 3 lists a week
    Including more fan fiction. So now is a great time to unfollow.
  2. Write 1 blog entry a week
    I blog about movies, it's not a big deal, I should probably make it one.
  3. Reduce dessert consumption in some way
    This one scares me. I've come to rely heavily on sweets in my sobriety. But the train can't run forever. I gave up chocolate for 2008, so I think I can make a go of this. I'm also going to give myself until mid-February to make a workable reduction/replacement plan. This one is about the long haul.
  4. Pay off my college loan
    s'close.
  5. Read more
    I love books. I buy books. I stack the books. After a few weeks, I dust the books. Time to break these chains of love. (Early Feb deadline for the plan/schedule)
  6. Submit four short stories to publications.
    March/June/September/December/Boom. (Boom on spec)
  7. Vegetables 2x a day
    I was that asshole who walks around telling people, "I don't have to like vegetables, I just have to eat vegetables." I miss that asshole.
  8. Floss every day.
    We have entered the sexy half of the resolutions in case you're wondering.
  9. Make eye contact with every person I speak to, even if die of awkwardness as I do so.
    Control yourselves.
  10. Online date again.
    My times on OKC and Tinder were slapstick disasters. But motherfuckers love to laugh.