Inspired by @semioccasional . @aus10 this is my submission for March Madness round 1.
  1. Someday I'll write, produce, and direct a movie.
  2. But a movie is only as good as your dream team. Here's mine, for the psychological men's fashion thriller NICE JEANS:
  3. Cinematographer Gordon Willis
    Willis passed away a couple years ago. He is bar none my favorite cinematographer. Willis shot the GODFATHER films, ALL THE PRESIDENT'S MEN, and MALICE among many others. Throughout his work, Willis mixed seemingly natural light with extreme gothic shadows. That's just the look to demystify and add menace to the fashion world.
  4. Editor Thelma Schoonmaker
    The best in the business. Schoonmaker had edited every Martin Scorsese film since RAGING BULL, and has (so far) won 3 Oscars. Good film editing is invisible in a way, but her work results in long, complicated films that are swiftly paced, clear, and shift easily between many different tones.
  5. Costume Design by Milena Canonero
    Theoretically this movie makes the weird world of artisanal denim seem actually interesting, so I'm going to need a costume designer who can think forward but bring out the greatness in classic trends. My bet is on Canonero. She's done costumes for Kubrick, Warren Beatty, Sofia Coppola, and Wes Anderson, and won 4 Oscars for her trouble.
  6. Score by Broadcast
    A great band in their own right, they're almost defunct following the death of their lead singer. However, they did one of my favorite recent scores, for the horror movie BERBERIAN SOUND STUDIO:
  7. Script doctoring by Paul Thomas Anderson
    PTA writes self-destructive losers so well, and he's gracious enough to sit down with me for a couple days and talk through ways to help the script. He has a couple great Burt Reynolds stories and now there's a Japanese denim buyer in the movie who says, "Bogart my samples? Bacall me never."
  8. And starring
  9. Donald Glover as Robby, a bored technical writer who has a side job breaking in raw denim for rich guys who want jeans that are already broken in "but the real way."
    Glover's movie star career starts now. "Don't talk to me about Cone Mills, Douglas. Cone Mills is the Angus Beef of pants. Saturday, you and me, we go down to the Tetsuo Jim sample sale, I know Jim, he'll get you a pair of midnight weft, 15 ounces. Real nice show-through. I'll wear them for you for two months, *while hiking*. Guaranteed sick fades. You'll be the talk of the bachelor party."
  10. Amy Seimetz as Corin, owner of a boutique chain Bobby meets at a wholesaler's convention.
    Seimetz has a long resume in indie film, but my favorite performance of hers is in UPSTREAM COLOR. "Your three texts helped me feel safe, thanks for those. I have an actual job so I don't have time to validate your core being, but Sabine at the register will honor the coupon you apparently printed at home. Re-up your cyan, dude."
  11. Steven Soderbergh as Dr. Oakes, a cardiologist who hires Glover.
    Based on his acting in his own film SCHIZOPOLIS, and his demeanor in commentaries and interviews, Soderbergh has a career as a character actor just waiting for him. He'd be perfect as an aloof yet vaguely menacing rich guy. "I like your chart. You have good recommendations. Wear these jeans for me. 2 now, 6 on delivery. But I need them by Labor Day. Do you juice?"
  12. Setsuko Hara as Masamura Seiko
    In life, Setsuko was one of Japan's great actors, appearing in many of Yasujiro Ozu's films like TOKYO STORY. In my dream, she lives again and plays the head of a Japanese clothing brand. "Does Seth McFarlane write your term sheets? Because very funny. (beat) Just translate how I say it."
  13. We originally cast 1974 Marlon Brando as Corin's father.
    But two days in, my A.D. pulls me aside: "Marlon wants to wear a Creature From the Black Lagoon mask for the board room scene today." And I know it's over. We don't have Coppola money to fuck around for three months. Brando and I talk in his trailer. He gets it. We hug. We still text sometimes about BROAD CITY.
  14. And working with my dream casting director Laray Mayfield, we found a perfect replacement:
  15. Barack Obama
    He's a born actor and newly available. He has great chemistry with Seimetz. Obama works out so well we add a couple more Dad scenes. The entire crew starts smoking during his time on set. "How is it you own five stores, but I'm buying dinner? Your new boyfriend's almost as good as three boyfriends ago. Where does he get his jeans?"
  16. And for Craft Service, there's just one name to call: Fabrice Fabrice, the Beast from the East, a name so nice I said it AGAIN
    On this budget I'm not going to be able to pay these geniuses anything, so to keep everyone happy and motivated, I'm going to need crafty served with attitude from Comedy Bang Bang's own Fabrice Fabrice. I'm not sure how this works with Nick Kroll's acting schedule.
  17. NICE JEANS, coming October 2017 from Annapurna Pictures and A24 Films.
    "Look good. But don't let them see you trying."