Probably applies to all other sports too and yes it's always dudes.
  1. Be the guy who doesn't pass to the women on the team.
    You are the actual worst.
  2. Be the guy who constantly yells "anybody need a sub?" from the sidelines but will never take himself out.
  3. Be the guy who takes the game WAY too seriously.
    Seriously the national team call up isn't happening you're 30 playing soccer after work chill the fuck out bro.
  4. Be the guy who body checks women because he forgets how big he is.
    I am small, but I will dribble around you. Body checking me when you can't take the ball is not an appropriate response.
  5. Be the guy who takes over the half time meeting with terrible advice for the team but of course he's the expert.
    No we should not play more long balls to the corner.
  6. Be the guy who doesn't pass to anyone.
    You are not going to dribble through 5 players even if you try 100 times.