It Happened to Me (or, I Imagine Better Xojane Articles)

  1. ...my boyfriend swallowed my nose ring while we were making out.
  2. ...I was fired because of my feelings about the Zodiac (and Mercury wasn't even in retrograde!).
  3. ...my roommates refused to cast a mouse-ridding spell with me in our apartment.
  4. ...I was bus-shamed on an OkCupid date.
  5. ...I had to change grocery stores after one bad date.