DID DANNY AND SANDY BANG: AN ANALYSIS OF SUMMER NIGHTS
Taking into account the (very juvenile, but useful here) rule of 3s: multiply the content of everything Sandy says by 3 and divide everything Danny says by 3.
- •"Summer lovin' had me a blast, summer lovin' happened so fast."Accurate description of teen banging. +20 for banging
- •"She swam by me, she got a cramp."What does this even mean? This has nothing to do with sex. Terrible boast, Danny. -30 for banging
- •"He ran by me, got my suit damp."This never sounds innocent, but may just refer to some ocean-based heavy petting. That being said, it comes from Sandy, who's trying to play it down. +35 for banging, +10 adjustment because it came from Sandy
- •"Summer days, driftin away, to (uh, oh) those summer nights."Why the emphasis on nights? Because that's when sex happens. +30 for banging
- •"Took her bowling in the arcade; we went strolling, drank lemonade."Innocent summer time activities. -30 for banging
- •"We made out under the dock; we stayed out till ten o'clock."NOW we're getting somewhere. This sounds like the same story, set up to support two opposite reputations. This definitely happened; plus/minus whether it led to a home run. +50 for banging
- •"He got friendly holding my hand."I'll bet he did. +10 for banging
- •"She got friendly down in the sand."Sex in the sand doesn't work, Danny. Rookie move to brag about that. -65 for banging
- •"He was sweet, just turned 18."We get it, Sandy, it was consensual. +5 for banging
- •"Well, she was good, you know what I mean."Uggggh, this is such a teenage boy brag. Gross. +25 for banging, -10 adjustment because it came from Danny
- •"It turned colder; that's where it ends, so I told her we'd still be friends."Dunno, this sounds awfully mature. -10 points related to banging.
- •"Then we made our true love vow.""True love vow" absolutely means loss of virginity. +55 for banging
- •Verdict: +95, definitely banged