EXPIRATION DATES I DO NOT ACKNOWLEDGE, BY SITUATION
After writing this, I am alarmed at how gross I am. Also shocked that I do not have 70 kinds of raging infections.
- •In grooming: makeup, hairstylesStill rocking some supplies from high school, and this hairdo has been the same for about 10 years. "If it isn't broken, no need to fix it." - me and also some other people
- •While gardening: soilI had to look up if it even expires. Spoiler alert: it does.
- •In a relationship: breakups, grudgesI am a wonderful girlfriend. And ex-girlfriend.
- •In the shower: loofahs, razorsLoofahs are replaced when they fall apart. New razor when I remember or have an especially hot date.
- •While preparing food: any and all grains/pasta/flour, spices, spatulasReplace if/when moldy or a fancy new version seduces me at the grocery store.
- •In conversation: puns I thought of too lateThey're still funny.
- •In eating food: perishable goods of any kind, particularly eggs, they never go badIf it smells right and isn't visibly rotten, it's edible.
- •While cleaning: apparently all these cleaning supplies have expiration dates?Who knew?