THINGS I BELIEVE IN: LIVE SPORTS EDITION
Inspired by my very first NFL game today.
- •Root, root, root for the home team.It's just good manners and more fun. That is, unless you are at Yankees stadium or watching the Red Sox play, in which case, put your brain back in your head and do what's right. (YANKEES SUCK GO YOU RED SOX).
- •Standing the eff up for the national anthem and taking off your hat.Because America! 🇺🇸
- •The souvenir cup.Or special edition or whatever. It tastes better.
- •Getting a hot dog!Love me a stadium/ball park dog.
- •Clapping for big plays and standing up when everyone else stands up and high five-ing your neighbors when your team takes the lead.This also applies to saying things like: "cmon!" and "UGH!!!!" and "ooooooohhhh" and "YAH!!!" when applicable. Just like, get in the spirit.
- •Not razzing the opposing team's fans as long as they're polite.True story: once, in Yankee stadium, @donnie was clapping for the Red Sox (like a human with sense in his head) after a home run. A very scary man with like, Yankees neck tattoos told him to "sit the fuck down." @donnie said, "Hey man, just want to root for my team, I won't be a jerk and I'll sit down in a second, you clap for your team and I won't give you a hard time." And this guy stared him down for a second, then was like, "alright, cool." And that's my favorite sports story of all time.
- •Appreciating the marching band when they play.Because my dad was in one, I was in one for one brief, hilarious semester, and they're badasses.
- •Drinking.I believe in all drinking at live sporting events.
- •Reading odd stats and discussing with people around you.That's WHY they're on the Jumbotron, y'all.
- •Yelling at the ref/ump like they can hear you.WHAT ARE YOU, BLIND?!? GET SOME GLASSES, REF!
- •Making remarks about head injuries and their lasting damage.Sorry, can't turn it off 😬. Helmets don't do enough ⛑.