Alternate Names for Common Medicine Brands

let's be honest: Advil could've been the name of a Disney villain
  1. Swallow This Disgusting Thing As Fast As Humanly Possible (Mucinex)
    side note: who in the world thought that an anthropomorphic glob of green mucus would be an effective marketing strategy?
  2. Your Annoying Hipster Sister's Son (Tylenol)
    "look, Karyn, I know 'Tylenol' sounds like a hip version of 'Tyler' but you simply cannot name your son after a medicine"
  3. The newest pair of Pokémon (DayQuil and NyQuil)
    in the pitch meeting: "so, we were thinking, what about two porcupine pokemon? one's nocturnal and one's diurnal. the truth is, we have no idea what kids are into these days"
  4. an SAT vocab word meaning "fed up" or "done with this shit" (Sudafed)
    "I'm just sudafed, Michael! I'm taking Tylenol home and we'll talk about this in the morning!"
  5. bonus: Gas-X
    say it really fast and it'll sound like something you definitely do not want to have