The 5 Stages of Coping With a Sexist Comment
At an event for work this week, two men told me I was very accomplished "for a little girl" and that they stuck to traditional values in their 100 year old organisation. Here's how I coped
- 1.Shock"What? Wait... what? Did someone really just say that to me? Why... what???"
- 2.Excuse-Making"I mean, I am little compared to him, I guess. Plus, he must be like 50 and I'm sure that's just how he was raised. I'm probably just overreacting."
- 3.Anger"No, hang on, this is bullshit. What the actual fuck. How can people be so fucking patronising just because I don't have a dick?"
- 4.Self-Hate"I should have said something. Why the hell didn't I say something? It's people like me who say nothing that make things worse because it tells them this is okay. I'm SUCH an idiot."
- 5.EmpowermentFor all you ladies out there, this stuff is jarring and intimidating and we shouldn't beat ourselves up about it. Saying something, even if it's not to that sexist prick, is good, and it's not wrong to be shocked into not reacting. That guy is a dick, and you did nothing wrong. You'll be better equipped next time (because, unfortunately, there will be a next time).