PARTS OF MY BODY, RANKED BY USEFULNESS

  1. Eyes
    Gateway to the soul, or whatever
  2. Brain
    My ride or die
  3. Ears
    Rumored to have bionic ears, right here.
  4. Hands
    Typing is indirectly responsible for the size of my bank account.
  5. Trachea
    Gimme air
  6. Lungs
    Sequel to trachea
  7. Heart
    Seems important
  8. Digestive flora
    The second brain! 2016 is our year.
  9. Glutes
    Allegedly without these being so large, we'd still be cruising around on all fours