1. WHERE'S MY MAC AND CHEESE??????
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  2. High-fiving a million Angels!
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  3. I wolfed my teamster sub for you!
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  4. I want to go to there.
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  5. One time I laughed at a blind guy eating spaghetti.
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  6. One time at summer camp I kissed a girl on a dare but then she drowned.
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  7. Not just a vacation! This one has beach socks and ice cream and sandwich turtles.
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  8. Who hasn't made mistakes? I once French kissed a dog at a party to impress what turned out to be a very tall 12 year old.
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  9. Guess who has two thumbs, speaks limited French, and hasn't cried once today... This moi!
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  10. There ain't no party like a Liz Lemon party cause a Liz Lemon party is mandatory!
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  11. I'm gonna go heat up some ham in the shower.
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  12. This is how I cry now! Ever since you made me get that off-brand eye surgery!
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  13. Lovers... That word bums me out unless it's between meat and pizza.
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  14. If I have learned anything from my Sims family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself.
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  15. My mom used to send me articles about how older virgins were considered good luck in Mexico.
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  16. I support women. I'm like a human bra.
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  17. Why are my arms so weak? It's like I did that push-up last year for nothing!
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  18. Yes to love! Yes to life! Yes to staying in more!
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  19. Wanna party? It's $500 for kissing, $10,000 for snuggling. End of list.
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  20. Shut it down.
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