MOST UNTRUE THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SAID ABOUT ME

today is the learn all about me day on this app guys
  1. "That's because you're an extrovert like me."
    Oh honey, no
  2. "I feel like you're generally clean."
    Does generally mean the same thing as not even a little bit?
  3. "You seem like you just get a ton of action."
    I strive to perpetuate this lie
  4. "You don't strike me as someone who would care about grammar."
    No idea why anyone would think this? It happened after they asked me to proofread an email and I was aghast that they didn't use the Oxford comma
  5. "This is Sarah, she's one of our developers."
    One of my coworkers introduced me as this when I first started and if I'd had a drink I would have spit it out
  6. "You remind me of Reese Witherspoon."
    Okay now you're just flat out lying
  7. "You're a chill person."
    Nope