THE CONSTANT BATTLE OF MY LIFE

  1. I want to be intimidating as fuck to everyone
    Because the characters and people I have always admired have been like this and don't care about being liked
  2. But I equally want to be just one of the gang, a cool person who's good for a chill hangout
    As I get older I realize being liked and close to people is like, really nice?? And actually a good thing?? I missed this memo?????
  3. But also you're scared of me?
  4. But also you feel so easy and comfortable around me?
  5. Comfortable and scared
  6. Basically
  7. The result of this usually results in me being a lot of people's loose acquaintance who is funny but icy
    It's made it really hard for me to make friends in my adult life. Beginning college was really hard for me socially and adulthood has been equally tough. Am I alone in feeling this way? I feel like people don't talk about this?? So I'm talking about it! I want to be better and I'm starting with HONESTY.
  8. I'm trying to lean more into the cool, chill part I strive to be and less into the distant figure I default to as a crutch that allows me never to gets hurt by anyone?
  9. This list may not be achieving that? Or maybe it will? Anyway I'm being vulnerable and that is a step!
    I don't know what I'm trying to achieve but maybe I should stop trying to achieve things and just express things!
  10. I like a lot of you a lot and want to say so
    I don't usually let on that I have any opinion on a person unless they force me. I'm gonna start being more vocal about when I like people! I hope
  11. Anyway BYE
  12. But also, Hi!