Cheaper By The Dozen kids vs. Yours, Mine, & Ours kids

IT'S A STEEL CAGE MATCH AND IT'S GONNA GET BRUTAL
  1. Nora & Lorraine Baker vs. Christina Beardsley & Phoebe North
    Winners: Nora & Lorraine. Lorraine would fight with words (some super sick disses about Christina's sweatsuit and Phoebe's belt buckle that's the size of Montana) and Nora would beat them to a pulp cause she's 22 and has dealt with her siblings for so god damn long.
  2. Charlie Baker vs. William Beardsley & Dylan North
    Winner: Charlie Baker. No contest. He would kick William's student body president ass & crush Dylan's little guitar playing fingers.
  3. Henry Baker & his clarinet vs. Harry Beardsley & Jimi North
    Winners: Harry & Jimi. Both Henry and Harry probably have some rage issues from being middle children/ignored that would come out in this fight, but something tells me that if Jimi would take off that Kangol hat long enough to help Harry fight, Henry would end up with a lot of bruises.
  4. Sarah Baker vs. Kelly Beardsley & Joni North
    Winner: Sarah Baker: YES both teams have lacrosse sticks (is that what they're called? Someone help me) but Sarah is a MASTERMIND.
  5. Jake Baker vs. Mick North
    Winner: Jake Baker. SK8 OR DIE.
  6. Mark Baker vs. Michael Beardsley
    Winner: Michael Beardsley. Watch out, four-eyes! He'll cut you.
  7. Jessica & Kim Baker vs. Bina & Marisa North
    Winners: Jessica & Kim. SO MUCH SASS BETWEEN THESE FOUR, but Jess & Kim are QUEENS and could take those life-vest-wearing losers down very fast.
  8. Mike Baker vs. Lau North
    Winner: Lau North. Mike is fearless, but Lau could EASILY outsmart him.
  9. Kyle & Nigel Baker vs. Otter & Eli Beardsley
    Winners: Kyle & Nigel. They're natural born pranksters and could tear the collars right off of those polos.
  10. Dylan Shenk vs. Naoko North
    (I ran out of Bakers so here's Beans from Even Stevens) Winner: Naoko North. Obviously.
  11. Hank vs. Ethan Beardsley & Aldo North
    Winner: Ethan & Aldo. Omg they would DESTROY him.
  12. RESULTS: Cheaper By The Dozen kids - 6 wins. Yours, Mine, & Ours kids - 5 wins.
  13. IN CONCLUSION: CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN WILL ALWAYS BE THE BETTER MOVIE & THE BAKERS ARE TOUGH AS NAILS AFTER BEING RAISED BY A COUPLE OF BADASSES LIKE BONNIE HUNT & STEVE MARTIN.