MEMORIES OF BIRTHDAY PARTIES PAST

Birthdays and I have a rough history
  1. When I woke up to an empty house because everyone went to a family reunion I wasn't invited to
  2. When a waitress at BJs Brewhouse spit in my food while making eye contact
  3. When I was kidnapped by a limousine driver in SF
  4. That one time I was hospitalized for massive dehydration
  5. That one time I had a dinner party planned and everyone cancelled 20 minutes before hand