Things That Are Illegal in My Country

  1. Spitting in public
  2. Free-roaming animals
    (Squirrels, chipmunks, and rabbits excepted). Control your pets, people.
  3. Naming your child whatever you want
    Please consult the National Index of Approved Names
  4. The Big Bang Theory
  5. Black licorice
  6. When children eat some horrible blue-colored popsicle and their face and hands are all blue and sticky
  7. Comic Sans
  8. Hobby Lobby