1. He is full of thoughts.
  2. I have a couple of things to say to you...I'll be right back.
  3. This is a pro-soccer office.
  4. I went to the ER, and they were like, "How did you get here?", and I was like, "Uber."
  5. You look like a teacher dressed up as a student for Halloween.
  6. Dude, how great is technology?
  7. I fully support your denial.
  8. Let's not make fun of the crystal-loving hippie- sometimes I know things that have value.
  9. Unfortunately for you, I'm leaving now.
  10. Is your full name Zachary? Sorry - did we go through this already?
  11. The struggle is too real.
  12. You have a great view. I have a view of your face.
  13. I'm so glad you went to some sort of cookie orgy and brought back favors.
  14. You're like the school bus of the office.
  15. I'm subtly mocking you on the inside.