What Does Matt Harvey Look Like?

New York Mets pitcher Matt Harvey once posed nude for ESPN Magazine's Body Issue. What happened?
  1. Exhausted deli owner
  2. Guy who can't believe his softball team is losing
  3. Football fan halfway through the second slate of games on Sunday who has been eating pretzels and drinking beer all day and is gradually realizing he's made some bad choices.
  4. Stoned member of matchbox twenty
  5. Oblivious Dana Carvey impersonator