PEOPLE I'M CONVINCED ARE SILENTLY JUDGING ME

  1. The dentist
    "Do you floss every day?" "Yes. I mean, I try to, but sometimes I forget, you know?"
  2. The eye doctor
    "Can you read this line?" "No." "How about this line?" "No." "Okay, how about this one?" "Um, yeah, that's um a t." "Did...you say that letter was a t?"
  3. The cashier at the grocery store
    Scans cake. Scans wine. Scans cookies.