I Just Walked Downstairs to Find My Ex-boyfriend Sitting in My Kitchen

This is such a solid time for the titles to be in all caps
  1. I was upstairs in my room packing for my trip to Florida tomorrow
  2. I had my headphones in so I couldn't hear anything
  3. I went downstairs to get a plastic bag to put my toiletries in
  4. And I hear guys talking but I'm just assuming it's my brother and my dad
  5. And it is them
  6. Except my freakin EX-BOYFRIEND IS SITTING THERE WITH THEM
  7. And I really don't like him
  8. So I just say "hi"
  9. And he just gives me his signature nod that's like "I'm trying to be polite but I think I'm superior to you so I'm going to blink slowly and bow my head slowly so you think I'm being prim and proper but you aren't worthy of a hello."
    If you didn't read that in a snooty old man voice you need to reread it.
  10. And I start to open the drawer to get a plastic bag and my dad is standing in front of it
  11. And I'm pulling it open so it hits him and he is not. moving.
  12. And he just goes "I'm sorry do you need something?"
  13. THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO MAKE DAD JOKES DAD
  14. THIS IS THE TIME TO GET OUT OF THE WAY SO I CAN GET THE BAG AND DISAPPEAR INTO MY ROOM
  15. And he finally moves and I get the bag and then my dad starts talking to me and I was just slowly backing a w a y
  16. Finally I leave and I turn around and go back up the stairs
  17. I left my door open so I could eavesdrop but I closed it once he started being condescending and sickly sweet to my mom
    My mom can see right through his bullshit so I wasn't worried, I was just pissed off.
  18. Who do you think you are showing up at my house on Christmas?!?!!!!
  19. I am so annoyed
  20. He's growing out his beard and it looks terrible
  21. Way to ruin my day asshole
    I was having a really good, relaxing, chill, Christmas. We all got some really down to earth gifts like socks and chocolate and Chapstick and my dog was doing really well walking and he was just so happy and we had good food and I was just so calm and relax and happy.
  22. Merry Fucking Christmas
  23. 😒🙄😠🖕