New year, still self indulgent & copying @stevecady
  1. Okay I know the world was falling apart, but really guys??? I'm funny
    It's the only thing I have going for me tbh
  2. Honestly I'm combing being #relatable with fake math??? What more do you people want from me???
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  3. Not enough Zayn haters in the house tbh
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  4. No one liked this & I think of Hilary's campaign team would have taken that into consideration maybe our country wouldn't be doomed idk
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  5. I CALL YALL OUT & STILL!!! SUCH DISRESPECT
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  6. Okay I get it y'all don't like license plate humor but also side note: ü r wrong
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  7. Honestly the second joke is better & no acknowledgement
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  8. Insightful look at a modern crisis
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  9. Okay tbh this one got some likes but THIS WAS THE MOST HUMILIATING MOMENT OF MY LIFE IF I CANT EXPLOIT IT FOR INTERNET FAME WHAT ARE WE DOING ON THIS EARTH EVEN I MEA-
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  10. Okay I know think the issue here was that everyone read it like a sentence & I read it like poetry & that shows how much better I am
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  11. I paid for this tweet with my actual money & this is what I get??? unbelievable
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  12. THAT IS CLEARLY COVERED WITH A LABEL MAKER WHY DOESNT ANY BELIEVE IN CONSPIRACIES ANYMORE
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  13. No one cares about my passions & now a cheeto leads the free world
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  14. The incorporation of media here is honestly top notch
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  15. CNN hire me for my incredible political commentary
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  16. Was this too niche??
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  17. Guys if we don't think my neurotic self loathing is funny anymore we have some foreseeable issues headed our way
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  18. A photo of the actual bruise!!! THIS IS HGH GRADE JOURNALISM
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  19. This also just needed more attn
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  20. Okay this one was definitely too niche I'll admit it
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  21. Look at the text, I used a fake newspaper generator guys
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    Follow up: "not even to each other. Coulda lived with that" ALSO SLEPT ON
  22. GUYS THIS WAS SO WILD Ü DONT EVEN LNOW
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  23. BOY BYE 👋🏻
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