1. You're not better than anyone else because you read and have good grammar.
    Static
    You'll hate nerds like u in a few years so just chill ok?
  2. You will try a drug!!!!!!
    Static
    However, you will not like it very much.
  3. Yr gay
    Static
    Surprise!!!!! U still like boys but u also like everyone else. You actually have crushes on a lot of girls but you don't even realize because heteronormativity (you'll learn about that when u discover feminism)
  4. You'll have multiple piercings and tattoos.
    Static
    And your parents won't disown you.
  5. Remember that time you threatened to become a vegetarian because you hated the fish your dad made for supper?
    Static
    That was just the tip of the lactose-free fro-yo iceberg, girl
  6. You get to see the real props from the real fucking Harry Potter set!!!
    Static
    YOU WILL ALWAYS LOVE HARRY POTTER ⚡️
  7. Also, YOU GO TO NEW YORK. TWICE.
    Static
    Once to have sex without your parents' knowledge. Sex is weird but it gets better.
  8. You're actually everything your conservative parents discouraged you from being.
    Static
    Except you're still a shy, socially awkward dummy. Good luck 🍀💕