LAST 5 TEXTS I RECEIVED

  1. "Gaaaaahhhh boo. I hope he's happy (sort of) but mostly not. (Which I can totally wish bc I don't know him)"
    Best friend proving why she is my lady love (Because she is a loyal friend but unfailingly kind)
  2. "We will probably get ListApp previews"
    @originalamericantreat and I discussing how booty it is to wait till fall for feminine wonder @lenadunham 's debut of Lenny Letter
  3. "Heyyyyyyy tell me all the things"
    I did. I told her all the things of the world.
  4. "Did you used to work in that building?"
    A building collapsed down the street from my apartment. A concerned coworker.
  5. "Okay, as long as you come bearing gifts you're good."
    People don't mind if you run late if you bring cake.