Reasons Not To Potty Train Your Toddler

  1. You will never again get to the front of the return line at Costco on a busy Saturday
    She will always have an emergency of the most urgent nature when there is one person left in front of you.
  2. Sanitary napkin disposals will hereinafter be mistaken for wonderful, tiny toy boxes.
  3. Nature will inevitably call the moment you and your other children sit down at the last table in a busy food court.
    Your other kids will be eating spaghetti.
  4. Automatic toilets
    Nothing can describe the terror of having it flush while she is siting on it.
  5. Car trips.
    And by "car trip" I mean anything longer than five minutes. Actually three. You should probably just stay home.
  6. You will never again be able to have an uninterrupted meal
    She will have to pee at least thrice
  7. Outhouses
    You will have to choose between holding your child as she squirms on the giant cavernous seat or keeping the door propped open with your foot. It will be a tough call.
  8. Snowsuits.
    These will have a diuretic effect.