REASONS WHY THE HOLIDAYS ARE AMAZING/AWFUL
Every year you look forward to the holidays/at the same time you dread them.
- •The food! Cookies, Pies, Roasted dead things!/You spend $1000 on groceries and you've gained 10lbs.
- •The presents! You've bought the perfect gifts, but that's not what the holidays are about and you know that./You're broke and no one likes your thoughtful gifts; they just want a gift card.
- •The music! Bing singing about snow! Mariah singing about love! Ah! My heart is swelling!/This fucking song is on AGAIN????
- •The decorations! Twinkling lights,Boughs of holly, Oh Christmas Tree!/Why aren't the lights twinkling? What is a BOUGH? You want HOW MUCH for a dead tree???
- •The movies! Scrooged. White Christmas. Love Actually. Charlie Brown./ Anything on the Hallmark Channel