MODEL Q&A

  1. So where are you from?
    I'm from this small town in the middle of nowhere in some Eastern European country you've never heard of.
  2. So, like, where are you from?
    Russia!
  3. How did you become a model?
    Well, you know, I was scouted in the same way we all were...at a mall! I was just shopping with my older sister for some pants that were long enough for me and this creepy man who probably is a predator approached me!
  4. Did he give you a card?
    Sort of! He gave me a flyer for this convention, where I had to pay a ton of money to attend, and he said that I could become a model!
  5. So exciting! So how old were you?
    Oh, like 17, which is so old. I lied and said I was 14.
  6. Cute! So did you sign with an agency?
    Of course! I signed with a big agency on a worldwide exclusive and they flew me to Paris for fashion week. It was so surreal.
  7. That's amazing. Did you book a lot of shows?
    Oh, a few, but designers you haven't heard of. Very exclusive showroom jobs.
  8. Like Chanel?
    No, but like their office was around the corner from a Chanel store!
  9. You have to tell me: What's the secret to becoming a supermodel?
    Genetics and free meals from promoters! It's so funny being obliged to hang out with guys in different cities around the world. I just love to travel.
  10. Same! What's your diet like?
    Oh, you know, the same: Juice, some kale, and sex with old men! I love it! They keep ME young.
  11. I should try that! I have to know: Are you dating anyone?
    Well, a model never tells, but since you're asking, his name rhymes with Peonardo LiCaprio.
  12. So mysterious. Now, what would you be doing if you weren't modeling?
    I'd probably be in college studying psychology and computer science.
  13. Wow! I didn't realize models are smart!
    It's crazy! We can use our brains to get away with murder!
  14. Wait what?
    Sorry what?
  15. Are you saying you murdered like a look or an actual person?
    I don't understand English. What you say?
  16. Did you kill—
  17. *recorder stops abruptly*