THINGS A DESPERATE PARENT DOES ON HIS NIGHT OFF

  1. 1.
    Forget to eat dinner
  2. 2.
    See a movie that makes him more anxious than he was before he saw the movie (Damn you Joseph Gordon-Levitt)
  3. 3.
    Watch Modern Family
  4. 4.
    Watch Mad Men
  5. 5.
    Snack
  6. 6.
    Beer
  7. 7.
    Bed