Online Dating Nightmares

Want to know why I've given up? Here's some examples. (Identities have been hidden to protect the guilty)
  1. This charmer who thought a photo of him peeing catches him at the right angle.
  2. Can't you at least come up with something original?
  3. I want a man who looks at me the way this guy looks at a stripper's vagina.
  4. Are there girls that really go for this?
  5. "I'd sooner key that truck than ride in it." (This dude is from northeast Ohio, nowhere near the south.)
  6. The name, the caption, the message, the photo, the question marks. The question marks.
  7. Trolling and puns. My two favorite things.
  8. Can I submit this to Merriam-Webster for inclusion with the definition of "pretentious"?
  9. Father of my future children right there. (Notice this dude is 34. 34! Makes me feel sooooo much better about my maturity level)
  10. I have no words for this. No words. There's another photo of him pole dancing with fairy wings.
  11. People baffle me. I know there's someone for everyone but good lord. I shudder to think of who some of those people could be.