EXISTENTIAL DREAD (REAL REASONS IVE FANTASIZED ABOUT KILLING MYSELF IN THE PAST WEEK)

I may be a bit dramatic.
  1. Daughter read my text and didn't reply.
  2. Kid seemed slightly unhappy when I was leaving for work
  3. My "low tire pressure" light came on
    And seconds later...
  4. My "low fuel" light came on
  5. My landlord texted me
  6. Time Warner sent me an email that my new bill is "available."
  7. I wanted a taco but didn't have cash and I didn't want to use my card for a $1 purchase
  8. A customer I'd already sold to called in to say hi
  9. A customer gave me a 9/10 on a survey
    FYI that's considered a failing score. 9 means 0.
  10. I didn't have time to iron my shirt before work
  11. And then I realized I didn't wash my pants
  12. I finished 2nd in the monthly rankings at work to my rival
  13. Son asked me to buy something stupid on Amazon and I shut him down too quickly
  14. I completely forgot a close friends birthday.
    Even Facebook failed me
  15. Taco Bell got my order wrong.
  16. Again
  17. I ordered "water with lemon" at dinner
  18. My protégée has completely eclipsed me in popularity on li.st
    No, @marginally_amazing, you're great. NOT JEALOUS. AT ALL.
  19. My neighbor talked to me
    Ugh
  20. I left my car unlocked and someone stole the change I had in the cup holder