because ranking the women is too easy
  1. F/ ROSS.
    Easiest. Because he's a little bitch and he'll just be happy to get the attention. Plus it would be fun to make fun of him with his lesbian ex wife.
  2. M/ JOEY
    It would be an open marriage. But we're both going to age well and still be able to get 20-somethings back to our hot tub for a long time.
  3. K/ Chanandler Bong
    Because there can be only one of us, you sarcastic motherfuck, and I'm it!