How I Ended Up in the Audience for Oprah’s Twilight Episode

My greatest teenage accomplishment.
  1. I screwed around on the Internet.
    My college roommate and I read on Perez Hilton (yikes!) that Oprah was looking for Twilight fans to attend an upcoming show. We weren't big fans, but like most teenage sorority girls, we found Edward Cullen's sparkling skin to be quite arousing.
  2. I drunkenly wrote an essay.
    The application had one essay prompt: How has Twilight inspired you? I drank some boxed wine, wrote something silly about teenage heartbreak, and hit send. I regret not saving a copy. It's probably my finest piece of writing.
  3. Oprah's producer called me.
    A few months passed, I forgot all about it, and then I received a calI from Oprah's producer. She wanted me on the show! In fact, she wanted me to bring a gaggle of "young girls." She said that she had booked too many middle-aged moms for the audience. (Moms love Twilight.)
  4. She asked me to cry on command.
    When I arrived at the studio (with three friends and my sister -- it was in Chicago, and I was at Northwestern), the producer said that she had one front-row seat left. "Can anyone cry on command?" I proclaimed that I could. I got the spot, but when it came down to it, I shed no tears. Sorry, Oprah.
  5. I saw Oprah up close and she looked like a goddess.
    The Queen walked onstage and immediately removed her stiletto pumps. She was actually barefoot between every take. That's why she's so successful. That's the secret.
  6. I saw R-Patz and Kristen, too.
    The whole cast was on stage. This episode taped before Rob and Kristen went public with their romance, and I remember they were bad at hiding it. They also seemed terrified of all the Twi-Moms.
  7. I kind of won a diamond ring.
    It's not an Oprah show without a sweet giveaway, of course. All audience members received dinky fake replicas of Bella Swan's engagement ring, but my friend won a real diamond one. Basically a win for me.
  8. Here I am on the TV!