STAND UP COMEDIANS I LOVE
I listen to comedy every night in order to fall asleep. I have a lot of opinions.
- •John Mulaney"In terms of instant relief, cancelling plans is like heroin."
- •Aziz Ansari"[on marriage] Put this ring on your finger so people know we have an arrangement."
- •Mike Birbiglia"I love pizza so much. I would marry pizza, but it would but be an elaborate plot to eat her whole family at the reception."
- •Brian Regan"If you're having second thoughts about the trip you booked to see Native American tribal lands...is that a reservation reservation reservation?"
- •Mitch Hedberg"Fettuccine Alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults."
- •Steven Wright"I bought a decaffeinated coffee table."