SHELLI'S APOCALYPSE SURVIVAL

The who, what, wear (not a mistake) and weapons of mine for when the zombies come..
  1. Better get ready and still look good enough to snag my own personal Glenn.
  2. Who
    Anybody who rolled with me when we were super broke and working retail, to my lovely neighbors and that boy at Dimos pizza who I've been trying to fuck with for 4 months. Mum and daddy are back in Michigan being kept safe by my hunter brother and his unlimited supply of bullets and jerky
  3. What
    In my apocalypse a cat has started the whole thing with a scratch. I don't have cats but I know homies with cats so as soon as the news breaks I know who to avoid going to check on because I told you...cats are evil.
  4. Wear
    THE most important! I'm wear gray leggings, oversized sheer tank, cute ass black bra (that's also comfy seeing as though who knows when I'll get to change it) black zip up hoodie , dark brown combat boots and a black backpack. And a hat...I want a hat.
  5. Where
    I'm camping out at a building I've found in the Logan square neighborhood in Chicago, it's basically perfect with enough height to see what's going on, enough exits to cover, enough space to be comfy and a toll booth to make out and bang in.
  6. Weapons
    I have a croquet set, I'm taking a mallet, drilling holes in each side and inserting various sharp knives on both ends. Close enough to swing and get brains and far enough to not get bitten because...fuck that. I'll also rock a thigh knife or two...and my goal is to find a grenade launcher.
  7. Hair
    High bun for ass kicking zombie time, shake it down when it's time to fuck in the tollbooth with the Dimos boy.
  8. Backpack
    Panties (because duh) tampons (also duh) condoms (tollbooth time and yay we survived another night sex) snickers (not sharing) water (I guess) oatmeal packets (hell yeah) and for some reason I really want to bring my phone and charger...
  9. Vehicle
    I mean I'm gonna be on foot a lot buuuutttt...if a bitch comes across a pick up truck, I'll snag it. But I'm in Chicago so it's more likely I'll find Prius's and Hoverboards.
  10. I shall survive
  11. If you are rolling with me and you make false moves, I'll leave you
    Especially in the first few months, I have no time to teach you and chit chat, you should have watched tv and prepped like all the rest of the millennials.
  12. I hope to start a bad ass girl squad
    Of bad ass babes who survived and we come together and I don't know, keep surviving and somehow make it to Florida and build a colony and start over.
  13. What will I miss the most?
    My mom. JK tacos. JK....my mama bringing me tacos.