HOW CAN YOU SLEEP AT NIGHT?!

Inspired by @kylabender
  1. Electric blanket
    Turned on 10 minutes before I actually get in bed
  2. One pillow
    One of those pillows curved for maximum neck support. I don't know if it works, but my ex-husband hated it so I use it to spite him
  3. Sheet tucked in at the bottom but never on the sides
    So there is plenty of room for my feet
  4. Control for electric blanket right by my pillow
    In order to wake me up when it falls off the bed
  5. Alarm set for 6:35 AM
  6. Wake up at 2:30 AM
    For no good reason at all. (The electric blanket control has long since fallen off the bed.)
  7. Get out of bed
    Take care of household chores, knit, or sew but avoid screens at all costs.
  8. Go back to bed around 6 AM
  9. Silently curse when alarm goes off 35 minutes later.