NAMES I'VE USED FOR FRIENDS IN MY CONTACTS THAT ARE NOT THEIR REAL NAMES

  1. Holiday Honey Ham
  2. Waldorf Salad
  3. Christopher Columbus
  4. Rodz
  5. Cro-fuxking-no-co-quay Morse
    My friend Sean once drunkenly texted me this when I asked him if we could play croquet.
  6. Watermelon Crazy
  7. Erin Da Poop
  8. Fluff
  9. One Shoe
  10. Bob Dylan Gibbs
  11. Nick Velociraptor
  12. Sea Weed
  13. Cliff
  14. No Fries Riley