1. Veggie Straws
    I'd rather eat veggies.
  2. Pretzels
    My mouth has too much moisture, let me eat the driest thing known to man.
  3. Salty Nut Roll
    Keep your eyes on 'people' who eat this shit. They're clearly not human.
  4. Cheezits
    Doritos for poor people.
  5. Corn nuts
    They're neither corn nor nuts. Discuss.
  6. Anything by Nature's Valley.