THINGS I THINK MY DOG THINKS

  1. Why is she staring at me again?
  2. Why does she keep saying my name?
  3. What's that smell?
  4. Who am I, really?
  5. Will I make my mortgage payment next month?
  6. Will she give me a piece of food if I sit here and stare at her?
  7. Why can't I fit both of these toys in my mouth at once?
  8. Why does it smell like cheese?
  9. What's that moving over there?