HOW I KNOW MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY IS RIGHT AND THAT TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE

  1. I came home from work exhausted, ready to fall into bed. I ate some jerky for dinner (I'm a grown up!!) and clicked a few things on the inter web and boom: it's now several hours later and I'm wide awake.
    Clearly time is not linear, and is controlled by the illuminati. Otherwise, how could I not have been in bed asleep for the past few hours?!
  2. A more accurate title for this list, in retrospect, is probably "the aftereffects of excessive excel use while sleep deprived."
    Nonsense. Nonsense is the chief aftereffect.