What I actually learn in European History

  1. The War of Jenkins's Ear
    Some English merchants were illegally trading in Spanish waters down in like the West Indies and got arrested and Jenkins got his ear cut off. England didn't want a war, but Jenkins brought his ear in a jar to Parliament so they had to go to war for like 3 years
  2. A revolution should have a three-word slogan
    French had "Liberty, Equality, Fraternity." Bolsheviks had "Peace, Land, Bread"
  3. Every major problem seems to lead back to a lack of bread
  4. Metternich is the epitome of conservativism
    It's been repeated so many times
  5. Bismarck is a really impressive guy and nothing would have happened in the German states without him
  6. The German guy that booted Bismarck out was an idiot
  7. Seriously, this guy General Leo von Caprivi once said, "What kind of jacka** will dare to be Bismarck's successor?"
    He was later appointed to be Bismarck's successor
  8. Austria is the worst
  9. Germany would not have been in WW1 if it hadn't picked stupid Austria as an ally and had to protect them
  10. The group that assassinated Archduke Ferdinand was called Union or Death, the Black Hand
    It's the most extra thing
  11. All the people in charge of assassinating Archduke Ferdinand should have been arrested
    Not for assassinating him, just for doing such a bad job
  12. Frederick II was a flutist, animal rights activist, composer, and best friend to Voltaire
  13. English feminist Emeline Pankhurst got ladies to blow up a bunch of post boxes and she chained herself to a wall at Parliament
  14. France's flag shouldn't have the red and blue, only white
    Always give up, always surrender
  15. Why do people keep invading Russia in the winter?
  16. The Defenestration of Prague
    They threw three guys out a window and ,if I remember right, started 30 years of war basically