Wonderful quotes from my dad

  1. My dad on dealing with the low battery chirp from the smoke detector-
    "I genuinely don't know witch is worse, dealing with these, or burning up in a fire".
  2. My dad describing busy traffic-
    "Uhhhh the stupid street with the stupid cars".
  3. My dad on the lady with the "God luvs u" license plate, who cut him off in the parking lot-
    "Yeah, he may love us...but he definitely doesn't love you".
  4. My dad on the angry birds movie-
    "I would rather jump off a skyscraper in New York than see that putrid movie".
  5. My dad on who could be president-
    "I mean, when I was a kid I remember being genuinely curious why my dad didn't run for president..."
  6. My dad on his new haircut-
    "I'm part cat, part dog, part human, part tidal wave".