Private Thoughts Of This Week

  1. Is that a cold sore by my lip? No, it's a zit. Thank God.
  2. This fitting room curtain will not stay closed.
    Maybe if I put my bag against it it'll be fine.
  3. How many hangnails do normal people have?
  4. This season of the Bachelorette is a total dud. It'll end up being Jordan.