How to Be ME in 5 Simple Anecdotes
Inspired by @tcdavis1
- •Set alarms for an early, decent time like 6 or 630. Wake up and stay in bed on phone till 9.
- •Get your car washed and waxed and vacuumed and all that jazz for a whopping $30. Park under birds' favorite tree in your complex parking lot.
- •Go to grocery store with list. Pick up everything on list. Come home feeling ecstatic about your green smoothie in the morning. Wake up and realize you forgot a liquid base. Kick yourself in the derrière for making incomplete lists.
- •Tell yourself to take your car in for servicing for 3 months before actually doing it. Constantly but silently, freak out while driving every day.
- •Go in to Target to pick up 1 thing. Walk out with a $70.56 bill in hand because you picked up 4 tops, 2 solely because they had elephants on them. The. Same. Elephant. Print.