we're not that close if...
- •I've never peed on the phone with youExtra points if I flush, double extra points if I pee/flush on speaker
- •You've never heard a relationship problem of mineI'm dramatic and always talking about men, it's gross I'm sorry
- •You don't know I'm allergic to fruitIt's fine if you forget but you have to at least pretend to feel bad that you forgot and act like it was something you've known forever. The real homies remember though.
- •I've never taken you to La BoccaMy fave restaurant and I make everyone go there all the time and it's probably pretty obnoxious but idc
- •We've never discussed Harry PotterGiven
- •You don't know about my gray hairI have pre-mature gray hair and it's so annoying and people close to me are v privy
- •You don't know about my health problemsLiterally too much to explain, hence why you have to be close to me to know the ins & outs because shit changes all the time
- •Also this list was originally inspired by @olive but stupid drafts made me delete that part before it ketone post it for some reason.