NIGHTMARE MATERIAL

some things that haunt me at night
  1. Christina Gutierrez, aka Adnan's TERRIBLE lawyer with the most annoying speaking-voice known to humankind
  2. Fat Val Kilmer
  3. The subculture of Dance Moms fans on Instagram
  4. Standardized tests
  5. Somehow all my saved drafts on Twitter might accidentally publish at once and everyone will see the thirteen different lame jokes I wrote about Jamie Dornan's beard
  6. Flatulence
  7. One day Game of Thrones will come to an end
  8. Did I take a whole Xanax or a half a Xanax?
  9. All snapchats are saved somewhere, by someone
  10. The chance my permanent retainer breaks in my sleep and causes me to choke to death on a small piece of plaque-covered titanium
  11. Why do we have time zones?
  12. Actual ghosts