TEN THINGS I LOOK FOR IN A SIGNIFICANT OTHER- RANKED
I have been dating seriously since I was 14 years old. I have lived with 3 different boyfriends, was proposed to twice and have never been married. I have learned a lot about what I want and what I don't want in a partner, all through trial and error. It's been a long and bumpy road.
- •Must not be overly religiousI am not a religious person and though I fully support everyone's right to believe and practice their religion as they wish (as long as they are not doing anything illegal or hurting anyone), I cannot date someone with strong religious beliefs. I have found in my experiences that they will eventually try to press their beliefs on you, and ultimately they are equally as disappointed with your lack of faith as you are with their excitement for it.
- •Must be a protectorI am a strong person, mentally and emotionally but I like being with someone that can also protect me physically. Call it social norms that have been engrained into my subconscious or just a natural animal instinct, but I like a man that can protect me/our family.
- •Must be physically attracted to this personI have dated a wide range of men, from models/actors to guys that would probably rank a 3-4 on the hotness scale. Attraction doesn't always have to be in line with what other people find sexy, but I must find them attractive. I very much enjoy adult physical activities, and if that passion and sex appeal isn't there for me, the relationship is doomed.
- •Must have a sense of humor and can make me laughThis is key to my happiness. He must be someone that brightens my day and makes me laugh.
- •Must be smartThis doesn't mean book smart. I need a man that has common sense, is aware of the issues and going ons in the world, and someone that can have a deeper and more meaningful conversation with me about life. If this is missing, a guy will never get past "hookup" status.
- •Must be someone that I fight well withThe good times will always be good. But bad times are inevitable. No couple is perfect or avoids arguments. It is a natural part of a relationship. So, I have to fight well with that person. If you are a nasty person, a name caller, someone who likes to scream, yell, etc. I want nothing to do with you. Being respectful and caring doesn't go out the door just because we are having an issue.
- •Must be kind and compassionateIf you don't care about children, the homeless, the sick, the elderly, then I don't want anything to do with you. You must have kindness and compassion in your heart. And if those feelings don't include our friends of the animal kingdom, peace out.
- •Must not be a heavy drinker or do hard drugsSorry, I don't drink at all (but don't expect him to NOT drink) and I have had too many alcoholics/ drug addicts in my life. If you partake in anything more than some casual social drinking and weed I am simply not interested.
- •Must be confident, secure and okay with dating a strong womanI have a job that involves long hours and traveling to lots of exotic locations with lots of men in or working with bands. That can be very hard for a man to accept and can be very hard for them to deal with if they are not confident and secure in our relationship and themselves. I make my own money, pay my own bills and rely on no one. For some men that can be an issue, they like to provide and don't always want someone to challenge their dominance in that area.
- •Must be honest and trustworthyI would take an honest man over anything. I have dated too many liars/cheaters in my life. The sense of relief and comfort in knowing that a partner has integrity and is honest is the absolute most important thing to me.