WAYS I HAVE CHEATED MY DATA PLAN
An important list written by an important man
- •Checking Instagram on a desktop computer like an absolutely fucking insane person
- •Spotify PremiumI can download all the music and playlists I want so I'm not using data when I'm out and about!!
- •Extricating people from my life with green text bubblesJaedon, if you can see this, that's why daddy hasn't been responding to your text messages. I think mom's going to let me come home soon, bud. Chin up.
- •Getting black out drunk by myself on weeknights and forgetting to plug my phone in before I go to sleepand then carrying my dead phone around all day at work like some made-for-millennials remake of "Weekend at Bernies"
- •Going outside to check the weather instead of looking at the weather appLike a poor person
- •Instead of writing tweets, just saying random thoughts out loud in a crowded area and seeing how many favorites* I get*public beatings from perfectly justified strangers